Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize