And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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