I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize