doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
