I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
