i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
