Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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