At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
