Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I have aggressive nipples.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
