I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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