I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
