Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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