he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
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For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
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I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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