she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.