I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
