Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
