She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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