in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You are a genius and a whore.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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