do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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