Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
