i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize