im drinking this country out of the recession.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
