we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
