Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize