She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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