Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
