Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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