So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
