I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
