I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
