my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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