OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
