if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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