dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Randomize
