thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
