Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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