i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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