Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
