Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
