i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk