Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b