I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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