i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize
