grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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