My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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