ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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