So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
