Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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