are you still at the devil's house?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
