just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
