Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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