What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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